I am suffering. I am mind. I am homeward.

You’re on the lam, you’re on the run
Don’t give your name, you don’t have one
And don’t look no one in the eye
That town will try to suck you dry
They’ll suck your brain, they’ll suck your breath
They’ll pluck the heart right out your chest
They’ll truss you up in your Sunday best
And stuff your mouth with cotton

Wait for me, I’m coming
Wait, I’m coming with you
Wait for me, I’m coming too
I’m coming
Wait, wait, wait, wait

I’m not sure why, but this song has become my latest obsession. It’s eerie and somber, but I also find it rather comforting. Listen to it: do you hear what I hear? Sadness. Nostalgia. Distant longing… 

After a pretty miserable few weeks, lousy Valentine’s day in which was spent in tears, and only a few hours with my family instead of an entire day, I have found an odd easiness in this song. It reminds me of all of my sadness but also reminds me of my strength – my ability to pick up and leave the pieces behind…a characteristic that used to bother me so, but I’ve become so accustomed to it that it no longer affects me. In former years, I would try to reassemble the brokenness of shattered hearts, broken minds, all underneath this over looming darkness that enclosed me like a soft blanket, but tortured my memories.

“Wait for me, I’m coming too.”

I have a new favorite book to add to my already all-inclusive list of favorites: The Odyssey.

Maybe it’s just the way my professor has been teaching the book, with such passion and emotion, more importantly emphasis… We were going over Book 11 today and he said he can never read that section without a tear or two falling from his eyes. My professor said that! I was…speechless, astounded!

For those of you who are not familiar with the story of The Odyssey, it is about a man named Odysseus who is on a journey to get home to his wife. But yet it’s not that simple, HE is a storyteller, all his stories have a point. They captivate the audience and the reader and they teach us something, whether it be manners on how to treat a guest, or how to truly love someone, Odysseus’ poetic brilliance enchants those who choose to listen…

The most beautiful part about Odysseus’ relationship with his wife is their “homophrosyne” which translates to mental oneness. The difference between his relationship with his wife and the other characters in this poem is that their connection goes deeper than just physical attraction. They are wise and clever beyond words, and their ability to level or simply communicate with one another on such a profound intellectual scale is truly awe-inspiring and beautiful.

Ok BethyD, what’s the point?


For some people, this life may be about finding the riches of gold and silver, the materialistic things life has to offer. Others it may be more spiritual, a journey to finding themselves. Even so, maybe it is finding the courage to break free: Breaking Freedom’s Chains. Yeah, I like that. Freedom from finances, abusive partners, broken relationships, self-harm, negative thinking…from parents that live their lives and dreams through their children rather than letting their children live their own lives and discover the opportunities that may grant them a new life into a new world. One parents may dream about, but ultimately fear for their children’s safety because they have never experienced it for themselves. Maybe it is a life of freedom from fear. Or a life spent finding happiness and then sharing  it with the world.

Homophrosyne. Mental oneness… 

Maybe it’s even finding mental oneness with yourself

Flying feathers by Lionique

“I am suffering. I am mind. I am homeward.” 

I am suffering because that is life.

I am mind because life teaches me to use my wit.

And I am homeward, because my life lessons will show me how to get there.

Take care of yourself, friends. Find homophrosyne with yourself before you attempt to share it with someone else. *fair warning from a broken heart*

“But now you wish to know my cause for sorrow –

and thereby give me cause for more.”

That’s why we build a wall, we build a wall to keep us free…


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